my disturbed self

I contribute ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to life.

Or to anyone.

I help no one. 

I can’t even help myself.

I’m a failure. I’m almost 22. I have NOTHING to show for it.

Except of course my life falling apart every couple months to the point I cannot function.

What is my point here?

NOTHING.

I’m wishing I could hit a vein.

Or I wonder if I should just go grab some pills and end it all.

Wonder what my therapist would say if they knew…

God. 

I love when people tell me to die.

I love when people tell me how much of a fuck up I am.

I have absolutely no way to deal with my emotions.

My psychiatrist just increases my medicine doses.

My therapist doesn’t do shit for me.

What was the point of being on this planet again?

Oh yea, to watch humanity fuck everything up and hurt others.

My bad, I forgot.